2011年10月9日星期日

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This learning experience has really shaped the person I am today. I also became more withdrawn
and had difficulty eating and sleeping. This problem was affecting every aspect of my life
and it felt like I was stuck. However, I knew I needed to do something
fast. They had always been my primary support system and I knew that I could
trust them. As a bully expert and professional speaker, I work with schools to help
eliminate bullying. Trusting others and communicating your concerns with them is a powerful strategy to
use. Initially, the threats were subtle. However, we can prevent this. They gave me the
confidence to face my fear and defeat my enemy. For some students, though, this strategy
may not work. When the school year began, I had no way of knowing
that the bullied student would be me. Suffering in silence, I kept the secret to
myself. I started arriving to school later and would take different routes to each of
my classes. Telling an adult should be the first step for all students who are
victims of bullying. "God, please help me," was all I could say. My
parents and teacher supported me and did their best to help. Even though I denied
the existence of a problem, my teacher knew something was wrong. I became the victim
of bullying and it was no fun! Stepping into the shoes of those I used
to abuse, I quickly realized what a horrible experience it is to be a victim
of bullying. I had never felt so alone and desperate. For the first three months
of eighth grade, I was doing well in my classes and I had a great
social life.However, I was about to experience something I had never experienced before. After
speaking with one of my teachers, the abuse stopped. When I was in the eighth
grade, though, the way I viewed bullying suddenly changed. Dealing with this new experience and
putting strategies into place to manage this situation would be my focal point for the
next two months. My parents had taught me right from wrong and I tn requin knew that
God was not pleased with the way I was treating others. If you are
concerned that your child may be a victim of bullying, don't wait until it's too
late.Communicate with your child every day and ask if other students at school are bothering
him/her. I didn't know what to do. My teacher approached me to see if
I was okay. I knew I needed to tell someone, but I didn't know who.To
my dismay, I saw Joe the next day standing by my classroom door eagerly awaiting
my arrival. I was fortunate. Initially, my request went unanswered, or at least that's
what I thought.Finally, I decided that I should avoid the bully. My thoughts were focused
on Joe and how I was going to avoid him. After sharing the experience of
my nightmare with them, we worked together to find a solution. Bullying can be stopped.
I wanted so badly for this problem to go away, but it seemed like
a resolution was nowhere in sight. I wanted to avoid this. In class, it was
difficult to pay attention to the teacher. Noticing a piece of leather in Joe's hand
and anger in his eyes, I was terrified! The fear returned. The fear is so
real that there are instances of students resorting to suicide as the only escape. Sharing
this issue with someone else was a difficult step. Educating the students, school staff and
parents about bullying is the first line of defense. Wondering what I had done to
upset him and how to resolve the situation would occupy my daily thoughts. Confronting
Joe was another strategy I contemplated using.The main reason I decided against this tactic is
because I was scared. I started to realize that this situation was more than I
could manage. This did nothing to deter my foe. I teased Mike and made fun
of the way he walked and talked. I kept asking God to solve this problem
for me. During my seventh grade year, I spent much time bullying my classmate
"Mike" (not his real name). I made the decision that during nike shox nz my eighth grade year,
I would protect the students who were being bullied. I was too embarrassed to tell
my teachers or my friends and I didn't want to worry my parents.
Encourage your child to speak to an adult, e.g., teachers, counselors, or administrators about the
problem.The fear associated with being a victim of bullying is real. Fear. But these infrequent
encounters soon escalated into daily intimidation. Mike's eyes held loneliness, pain, and suffering,
but I just looked away. Mike was physically and mentally handicapped.
I quickly did a u-turn and headed in the other direction. Arriving late to class
with tears in my eyes and a lump in my throat, I fended off the
stares of my classmates and sat down at my desk. Not all adults will be
so supportive.This unfortunate event has taught me that we can't do things alone. As a
former classroom teacher and administrator, I dealt with bullying and bullies almost on a daily
basis. Telling an adult that I was being bullied should have been my first step
in the process but as a child I did not know that. For a 14
year old, this seemed like a logical first step. My usual upbeat and positive attitude
was replaced with thoughts of hopelessness and depression. Towards the end of the year I
grew tired of bullying Mike and in fact began to feel guilty about the way
I was treating him. I considered telling someone about the situation, but initially decided
against it. Fighting fire with fire is not something I had been taught to do.
I wanted to do the right thing. My grades started to suffer. However,
it didn't take long for paranoia to be replaced with the realization that I was
being bullied. Besides living with the fear, I've seen it in many of my students.
I thought that if Joe found out that I had told someone, he would hurt
me. Even though I was not being verbally threatened or physically abused, the angry
stares that Joe directed my way were enough for me to fear for my safety.
Having this conversation with my parents was a turning point. I wanted to tell her,
but I was too scared. Every day, I brutally abused this poor, defenseless boy. 'Turning
the other cheek' was a strategy I was more comfortable with. I was a bully
in middle school. But, in order for this problem to go away, I knew it
was a step I had to take.That night, I told my parents. After following me
for what seemed like an eternity, Joe randomly decided to leave me alone. Being a
victim of bullying shattered my self-esteem and left me doubting that the future held any
promise. After much discussion, we determined that speaking to one of my teachers
should be the next step. If your child admits to being a victim of
bullying, please support him/her and work together to find a solution. I was physically smaller
than Joe and I also knew that getting into a fight would lead to trouble
at school. Everything I had tried up to this point was not working. The
guilt associated with my behavior finally got the best of me.One day, I decided that
I was not going to bully Mike or any other students. In fact, avoiding Joe
only seemed to anger him and increase the threat level. I spent many nights praying
and crying myself to sleep. This was the first time I had felt physically threatened.
My heart was racing and I felt sick to my stomach. The first time I
noticed "Joe" (not his real name) following me I thought it was just my imagination.
A resolution had finally been reached and my prayers had been answered. Because
of the fear it was difficult to make decisions. It didn't take me long to
figure out that this strategy was not effective. The evil smile on his face almost
paralyzed me with fear. No child deserves to go through this experience.For more tips and
information about bullying I invite you to visit [http://www.BillySimmsSpeaks.com]From Billy Simms-Your Trusted Bully AdvisorWant Bullying
To Go Away? Don't Delay, Call Billy Today.
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